I know the moment that I'm truly in awe of someone. I know when I like them.
I recently got lost on the way home from dropping off my sibling to work and stumbled onto a place I recognized. It felt so sad but happy at the same time.
Then I saw it. The apartments that I fell for my gamer. It's strange cause many of the people I have dated were into video games. It was different.
He enjoyed the games that I liked and didn't judge me for it. We shared the same taste in anime and manga as well. Even the corny ones. We had a curiosity for education and working. There was always a conversation to have along side the bed talk.
We met quite a few times. We actually talked on facebook. We chatted a lot.. and I can say that it was almost constantly after we were introduced to each other. It was like a click of a best friend I lost. We talked and talked. The deeper the conversations got the better the sex was.
The sex was so stimulating and fun. Something about hiding it from everyone made the thrill all worth wild. He liked control. He liked to control the situation and by that I mean he liked to have the place all to himself. Just us there. Made sure there were no distractions.
It was so fun and then it wasn't.
It became terrifying.
This apartment was right off of a freeway entrance and was on a slanted hill that led into a cul de sac.
It was a cute, very nice apartment complex. No one ever complained about our noise..
This day was different. When I came in and we did the dirty deed. We laid in his bed.
I talked to him about the action figures and the games that were being released at the time. Then I joked about taking a picture with him. I tried to take a selfie trying to convince him and he just wouldn't let me. He had said that he looks like a mess and that it wouldn't be worth it.. That's he's not all good looking anyways. He wrestled me down. It was playful like in the movies.
He did catch me. I ended up laid over him with my head on his chest. He was breathing heavily and I can just hear his heart beating so fast. When we locked eyes... It was different.
We made love. I know it just sounds so fucking corny. I mean it looks disgusting typing it so I can only imagine someone reading that. ew.
It was though. It was passionate and we were in total sync.
We were silent afterwards. He walked me out after I packed my bag.
He was still shirtless and put on his button up . He didn't button it.
He stood outside the front door peering over the little fence gate way that is framing the sidewalk.
I walked down the side walk and onto the curb. I felt his eyes piercing my back and it just felt so weird.
When I turned to open my driver side door I looked up at him again and we caught a look at each other. I felt it. I know he felt it too.
It was love. We both felt it and we were too god damn scared to say anything so he let me run away.
And that's what I did
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